How do you talk/joke with your kid?

I am just wondering because I have a student. Let's say the way her family talks to her and jokes with her and other students bothers me a lot.

They call each other names and stuff in a jokingly manner. Yet, after they are threw the kid is a complete mess and won't behave. Grant it they admit she is "spoiled rotten".

After they leave the classroom and its just her. She is much better behaved for us. Not temper tantrums, no telling us no, no hurting other kids.

They disturb the class by always checking in on her or sending a friend which works at the school in to check on her. This sends her spiralling out of control again.

Its almost like she thinks she has to act this way just for them. They really don't want her to act like this at all. As a matter in fact they beg her not too around them. I almost feel like she is convinced that she has too. I understand that kids act differently around their parents and push buttons. After months of working with this child. She can be so sweet if left alone and aggravated.

Yes, I joke around with my kids and tease them. Not like this...I don't call them negative words then expect them to behave properly. They even used a "curse" word to her face.

Okay, how many use negative jokes to get their kids attention and how many don't?
Please post a comment so I can better see the other parents shoe before I say anything to anyone at my school.